Why Real Estate Agents Leave Teams and What Leaders Can Do About It
Last Monday at 11:00 a.m., I had a reminder in my calendar to call and formally welcome a new team partner to North Group. We'd taken her through our full interview process and I was excited to tell her we were officially going into business together.
At 11:15, my phone rang.
It was one of our team partners, someone we've been in business with for four years, calling to tell me he was moving on.
Here's the part that makes it almost ironic. Three days later, I was scheduled to teach a webinar for team leaders on retention. On why agents leave your team and what to do about it. So if you're wondering whether I had imposter syndrome walking into that session, the answer is yes.
But I taught it anyway. Because nine years into leading North Group, I've learned that a departure doesn't disqualify you from this conversation. It's exactly why you should be having it.
The years our door revolved
In our early years, we looked like we were thriving from the outside. Awards, rankings, stages, momentum. On the inside, we were growing too fast. Shaky processes. Unclear expectations. And everything ran through me.
Our door started revolving and I couldn't figure out why. I cared so deeply about our people that I honestly believed caring would be enough to make them stay.
And every time someone left, I told myself the same thing: they just weren't the right fit.
Here's the problem with that line. It takes the ownership off of me and puts it on the agent. Even when someone truly isn't a culture fit (and sometimes they aren't), it's still on me. Expectations weren't clear enough. Something got missed in the interview process. The responsibility comes back to leadership every time.
What I know now: a revolving door is not a recruiting problem. It's a leadership problem.
Agents leave when they run out of future with us.
I learned that the hard way in 2022, when we had about $100 million in sales volume walk out the door in six months. One of those partners was candid with me: my vision at the time lacked clarity, and she couldn't see where the team was going or where she fit in it. That was hard to hear. It was also true. Departures are data. If you're willing to listen, the people leaving will tell you exactly where your leadership needs to grow.
The question that changed how I lead
Over time, I stopped asking, "How do I stop agents from leaving?" and started asking, "How do we build an environment where they see their future?"
If you lead a team, sit with these three questions honestly:
If I pulled our top agent into a room and asked where they see themselves in two to three years, would they describe a future that includes me and our team?
When did someone on our team last grow into something bigger, and did it happen because I helped build that path?
If I disappeared for 90 days, would our team get stronger, stay the same, or fall apart?
That last one matters more than most leaders want to admit. I used to think it was flattering that nothing functioned without me. I told myself it was because I cared so much.
It was ego. And it made everything fragile.
If the team falls apart without you, you didn't build a team. You built a dependency. And dependency is what agents eventually leave.
So I had to stop being the hub. We built a questions channel in Slack, and weaning myself off answering every single one felt like breaking an addiction (I'm not exaggerating, it was that hard). But the more I connected our people to each other instead of to me, the stronger our culture got. We had our summer kickoff potluck recently, and I left after a few hours. They stayed for hours after me.
That's the goal: build a team that doesn't need you. It's the ultimate gift you can give them, and yourself.
When they leave anyway
Don't talk people into staying who are already on their way out. I've done it. It buys you a short-term relationship, nothing more. Instead, go into the exit conversation with humility. Ask what you could have done differently. Send the handwritten card. And keep the door open, because some of them come back. Three of our current team partners left North Group at some point and chose to return.
If you take one thing from this, take this: how you walk someone out of your team says more about your leadership than their entire time on it.
Agents leave when they outgrow their future with you. That's not a burden. That's the job.